How do I help young people navigate disappointment and anger at injustice in the world?
Part of the journey of being a teenager is becoming an idealist. It’s one of the main reasons so much conflict can crop up within a young person’s own mind and in their relationships with others, particularly those in authority. For the first time in their lives their brain allows them to picture an ideal reality and to observe the gap between that ideal and reality. This type of thinking sends them in all directions with an unpredictable intensity, but doesn’t typically allow them to sort it all out with grace. That’s where adults come in.
Compassion, literally suffering with them, will be required. For some of us, compassion comes easily (it may be why you’re working with young people in the first place), but for many, a compassionate posture is hard to access.
Fortunately, we have a real and intimate connection with an unimaginably compassionate God. He went to great lengths to connect with us and our limited, sin skewed, perspective and rescue us from it.
Philippians 2:5-11
5 In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:
6 Who, being in very nature God,
did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;
7 rather, he made himself nothing
by taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
8 And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
by becoming obedient to death—
even death on a cross!
9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
and gave him the name that is above every name,
10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
11 and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father.
Through his Son, he extended that compassion to crowds by teaching, healing, warning, feeding, and even raising the dead(!), and he continues to act out of compassion for us today
Hebrews 4:15-16
15 For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin. 16 Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.
If you have trouble drumming up compassion, ask God to let his compassion flow through you!
Here are three helpful concepts and discussion prompts to help you apply God’s compassion to disappointed and angry young people:
Empathize: Start out by taking their side, assuming there’s some validity to the way they’re feeling. It’s often helpful to simply say, “I’m sorry.”
Educate: There’s a good chance their perspective is accurate on some level. Learn from them by listening, then do a little research yourself. Deep listening can help you honestly tell them, “It’s true.”
Engage: Begin to direct them toward using whatever resources are available (time, money, prayer, leveraging friendships…) toward real solutions. It’s time to ask, “How can I (we) help?”
These three questions can go a long way:
1. I’m sorry
2. It’s true
3. How can I help?
Need some extra help accessing compassion? Step in these passages where Jesus extends compassion to crowds and individuals:
Matt 14:14
Jesus saw the huge crowd as he stepped from the boat, and he had compassion on them and healed their sick.
Matt 15:32
Then Jesus called his disciples and told them, “I feel sorry for these people. They have been here with me for three days, and they have nothing left to eat. I don’t want to send them away hungry, or they will faint along the way.”
Matt 20:29–34
As Jesus and the disciples left the town of Jericho, a large crowd followed behind. Two blind men were sitting beside the road. When they heard that Jesus was coming that way, they began shouting, “Lord, Son of David, have mercy on us!” “Be quiet!” the crowd yelled at them. But they only shouted louder, “Lord, Son of David, have mercy on us!” When Jesus heard them, he stopped and called, “What do you want me to do for you?” “Lord,” they said, “we want to see!” Jesus felt sorry for them and touched their eyes. Instantly they could see! Then they followed him.
Mark 1:40–42
A man with leprosy came and knelt in front of Jesus, begging to be healed. “If you are willing, you can heal me and make me clean,” he said. Moved with compassion, Jesus reached out and touched him. “I am willing,” he said. “Be healed!” Instantly the leprosy disappeared, and the man was healed.
Mark 6:34
Jesus saw the huge crowd as he stepped from the boat, and he had compassion on them because they were like sheep without a shepherd. So he began teaching them many things.
Luke 7:11–15
Soon afterward Jesus went with his disciples to the village of Nain, and a large crowd followed him. A funeral procession was coming out as he approached the village gate. The young man who had died was a widow’s only son, and a large crowd from the village was with her. When the Lord saw her, his heart overflowed with compassion. “Don’t cry!” he said. Then he walked over to the coffin and touched it, and the bearers stopped. “Young man,” he said, “I tell you, get up.” Then the dead boy sat up and began to talk! And Jesus gave him back to his mother.
John 11:33–35
When Jesus saw her weeping and saw the other people wailing with her, a deep anger welled up within him, and he was deeply troubled. “Where have you put him?” he asked them. They told him, “Lord, come and see.” Then Jesus wept.
Matt 11:28–30
Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”
Luke 19:41–44
But as he came closer to Jerusalem and saw the city ahead, he began to weep. “How I wish today that you of all people would understand the way to peace. But now it is too late, and peace is hidden from your eyes. Before long your enemies will build ramparts against your walls and encircle you and close in on you from every side. They will crush you into the ground, and your children with you. Your enemies will not leave a single stone in place, because you did not recognize it when God visited you.”*
Heb 4:15–16
This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same testings we do, yet he did not sin. So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most.
Matt 9:35–38
Jesus traveled through all the towns and villages of that area, teaching in the synagogues and announcing the Good News about the Kingdom. And he healed every kind of disease and illness. When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them because they were confused and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. He said to his disciples, “The harvest is great, but the workers are few. So pray to the Lord who is in charge of the harvest; ask him to send more workers into his fields.”
Mark 8:1–3
About this time another large crowd had gathered, and the people ran out of food again. Jesus called his disciples and told them, “I feel sorry for these people. They have been here with me for three days, and they have nothing left to eat. If I send them home hungry, they will faint along the way. For some of them have come a long distance.”
Luke 13:10–13
One Sabbath day as Jesus was teaching in a synagogue, he saw a woman who had been crippled by an evil spirit. She had been bent double for eighteen years and was unable to stand up straight. When Jesus saw her, he called her over and said, “Dear woman, you are healed of your sickness!” Then he touched her, and instantly she could stand straight. How she praised God!
Matt 8:16–17
That evening many demon-possessed people were brought to Jesus. He cast out the evil spirits with a simple command, and he healed all the sick. This fulfilled the word of the Lord through the prophet Isaiah, who said, “He took our sicknesses and removed our diseases.”